we were once girls too,
I might learn it the hardest way that some love songs weren’t meant for assholes who toy with feelings as if it was some joystick,
maybe it was meant for your friends who constantly praised you for every accomplishment you had.
I might learn it the hardest way that some nights weren’t worth the tears for some assholes who said they love you but walked away the next day,
maybe it was meant for your friends who would ensure you were always doing alright and your lips were always curved into a smile.
I might learn in the hardest way that doing stuff wasn’t always that magical, especially with assholes who couldn’t stay true to what they said.
Sometimes, it’s a magical feeling too, to sit down with your girl friend in silence. While our hands were busy doing their thing, the surroundings were crowded but the small bubbles surrounding us felt tranquil.
Sometimes it’s nice when I look around, you were there.
Kindness was something you were very unflagging of and despite some shitty persona come by and go, you still stood tall with your head held high.
I admire how vast your heart was, how you wouldn’t let other people get clouded by your judgment yet you let them experience what you’ve gone through and had their own opinions.
I admire how you always make sure I’m doing alright, and I admire how even though stuff happened you still wanted to remain friends with me.
Being someone so kind yet strong and very intelligent is a gift, and you were a gift to me somehow.
There are things I would love to tell you and to share with you, and I hope you will forever be there to hear all of it. Even if it was stupid, even if it was dirty, even if it was unimportant, even if it was repeated, I hope you will always be ready to listen. Because I do too, I would love to listen to every word you have to say.
Happy 21st Birthday Alia, you were a unique soul that was crafted from Angels when they were in their best moods. How you were pretty, and yet accompanied with how smart and kind and gentle you are.
I know that you give people unconditional love, but sometimes the people you give reciprocate it with you learning about self-love. Which is a good thing, but I believe you deserve to be loved unconditionally too.
I WILL love you unconditionally, maybe the reason I learned to cook these days is that when you got sick and could not mobilize I’d make you a hearty meal just to make you feel better?
I guess this could describe what I wanted to say best :
Because you also loved me unconditionally, even though I told you I didn’t fully grasp what I felt that day you tried to understand what was bugging me.
Even though I went somewhere far, you will always be there when I decide to come back.
Not one guy, even the best ones, would love me the way you display it to me.
And that’s why I am forever grateful for what we had.
I would love to sit with you, in silence, minding our own things and thoughts, as long as I’m with you, I’ll be doing alright.
I love you, I hope someone loves you the way you love others. Unconditionally, and unflaggingly.
I hope 21 treats you as if a collector treats their prized possessions, I hope you will heal and become the best version of yourself always. I hope the universe will always be by your side, I hope we can be friends forever.
I love you, and I also am excited to see what the future holds for you!
Much love, Bila.
